Last year was a defining school year for me (you can read more about it here). After 16 years and 19 (yes 19!) schools I was overwhelmed by the number of educators around me who were visibly unhappy, many questioning their purpose, some leaving the professional altogether. At the same time, I couldn’t deny that I was feeling some of the same frustrations. So, I decided to take action and I started Joy in Teaching (you can check the origin here if you want).

And now the school year is nearly over and it seems right to reflect on what I have learned from my year of leave away from the classroom. Away from the “ah-ha’s” and hugs. Away from the bells and lack of bathroom breaks. Away from all that had been part of my life, and let’s face it identity, for over a decade and a half.

They say hindsight is 20/20 and I have to say I wholeheartedly agree. So here are my main takeaways:

Perspective is Tricky

The number of nights I laid awake replaying my day, worrying about my students, and mentally planning my approach to the next school day were endless. It was a serious problem, especially as I started to open my eyes to the mass dissatisfaction of teachers around me. I would lay awake for hours only to start the next school day exhausted.

I was in it.

Deep, in it. I couldn’t let school go. I would go home to my husband and little boys and still be thinking and fretting about everything that happened during the day. I didn’t know how to separate school-life and personal-life. I brought it home with me every day and the impact was felt by all.

Looking back now I know that staying up late, exhausting myself, bringing home my stress and anxiety only created a spiral that was more and more difficult to escape.

I can see now that if I had done more self-care, if I had allowed myself to pause more, connected with my social support and talked more with my colleagues that I could have turned things around.

I realized this as I began researching teacher resilience (which eventually became this book) and THIS is why I chose to take the year off, why I started Joy in Teaching. Because, when you’re in it, deep in it, it’s hard to see the forest for the trees. Perspective is tricky like that.

Self-Care is Essential

As a teacher, there is an expectation (real or perceived) that we are always giving. The idea is that we put ourselves after our students. That we are self-less, spending our own money on our students and classroom while not expecting compensation, while not needing respect or recognition or fair wages. But, the truth is that giving to yourself IS giving to your students.

Setting yourself as a priority, taking time for you, allows you to give more of yourself – because you have given to yourself first (you can find some more ideas here).

We underestimate the amount of power self-care can have.

And I see that now, looking back. If I took time for me more I truly believe I would have been a better, happier teacher, but I couldn’t see it. When teaching became stressful my world became as small as the four walls of my classroom. The last thing on my mind was going out for drinks with a friend, getting a pedicure, or catching a movie. It seemed selfish – but self-care is not selfish. And that is clear now after my year away from the classroom.

Defining Your Support Network is Key

When things got tough (at least for awhile) I thought I just need to work harder. This is a common misconception of many teachers. When things get hectic, when the schedule is intense and the demands are pressing – we dig in deeper.

There is an inner monologue that happens, something like “If I just stay later, come in earlier, take this home with me, do this and that over the weekend… then things will be fine” but that’s not the case. Because as we all know, a teacher’s job is never done, there will be always be more work today, always.

What I see now is that the burying your head in the sand like an ostrich is not the solution and although it feels like you doing something about the stress that is swallowing you up, you aren’t.

You are just keeping busy, very busy. As I began researching teacher resilience and retention (all in the book) it became clear that having a support network, a community, or even one or two willing people to hear you out was where the energy needed to be spent. Talking with other teachers let me know I wasn’t alone in my frustrations and overwhelm. Talking with my family let me know that there were people in my corner.

Having a support network is so important – so we don’t just disappear into stress or let it devour us.

And, this is exactly why I starting the Free and private Joy in Teaching Facebook group. Knowing that no matter how tough a day can be we have people to share it can make all the difference. And, it’s not just for the bad days, having a support network is also beneficial for your good days, to have people to share in the success and joys – because after all, it’s those moments that is what we teach for.

Looking back on my year away from the classroom there are things I don’t miss and things I do.

I don’t miss the schedule, the bells, the lack of recognition for my hard work, experience, and knowledge. I don’t miss splitting up fights and adolescent drama. I miss many of my students and colleagues, I miss the day-to-day comradery and laughs from both. I miss the “a-ha’s” and visible growth – knowing I was a part of it. But, the number of educators I have reached through Joy in Teaching, through my group, social media, articles, and book,- the teachers who have reached out to let me know that what I have done has connected with them and made them a stronger teacher has made this year worthwhile.

So what’s in store for me next year you might be asking? Well, I have extended my leave for another year. With the Joy in Teaching book out now I have some plans for the future of Joy in and Teaching.